You can download a PDF version of When Will Worship Start. If you use it, let us know in the comments!

Pastor:    Good Morning!

Cong:      Good Morning!

Pastor:    Welcome to worship this morning. It’s great to see so many of you here. I’ve been asked to share a few announcements with you today: The Youth Group’s Spaghetti Dinner will be held next Saturday. Tickets are still on sale. Visit the Welcome Center if you’re interested.

Youth:   Pastor! Excuse me, I’m sorry for interrupting. We’ve changed the place where you can buy tickets. Apparently people who have never been to our church before come to the Welcome Center looking for information about our congregation. It was nearly impossible for people to even purchase tickets because of all the new visitors. So you can purchase tickets in the church office now. Thank you.

Pastor:  Very Good. I’ve also been asked to share with you that the Church’s Bowling team won 1st place in our city’s annual bowling tournament. (A member holds up to trophy previously hidden under his chair. Everyone admires the trophy.) Their trophy will be on display at the Welcome Center immediately after worship.

Bowler: Pastor! I’m sorry for interrupting but in light of recent comments made by the youth group, I’ve decided to move the trophy to the coffee and doughnut table.

Pastor:  Alright. Thank you. Another announcement: The Dog Obedience class that meets in the church parking lot is being moved to the softball field behind the school because Mrs. Busch believes that the hot asphalt is damaging to Twinkle’s paws, her prize pet poodle.

(Mrs. Busch stands and non-verbally thanks everyone for understanding).

Youth:   Pastor! Excuse me, I’m sorry for interrupting. But isn’t the Dog Obedience Class on Thursday evening?

Pastor:  Yes, I believe that’s correct.

Youth:   Thursday evenings are when we host the city wide softball tournament. We’re playing the Methodist church this week.

Pastor:   OK…it sounds like we have a schedule conflict. I suppose it would be OK for the Dog Obedience class to move to the gymnasium.

Bowler:   What?!?! Pastor, do you realize how expensive it was to put in that gym floor? What if one of those dogs does their business on it?

Pastor:   Well, I suppose that’s possible. Unfortunately it looks like Dog Obedience class will have to switch back to the parking lot. (Mrs. Busch gets up and storms out.) We can pray for clouds!!!

#1:        Wow! This congregation certainly has a lot of announcements.

#2:        I agree. I wonder when will worship start?

Pastor:   Finally, the last announcement is…

Youth:    Pastor! I’m sorry. I have one more thing to share. The Youth Group’s Chili supper will be in two Saturday’s. So this Saturday is the Spaghetti supper and then next Saturday is the Chili dinner. Proceeds will go towards new uniforms for the softball team.

Pastor:   Very nice. Now, the final announcement that I have is Mrs. Hipple still cannot find her 9 inch casserole dish. It was last seen at the congregation’s pot-luck luncheon last Sunday. Please check to see if you took hers by accident. Now, let us prepare our hearts for worship.

#1:        Finally.

#2:        It’s about time… Isn’t worship the reason we’re here anyway?

Pastor:   Please turn in your worship folder to page 3 where you will find…

Bowler:  Pastor. We don’t have any worship folders. I didn’t see any when we came in the door.

Youth:    Sorry, the youth have been busy photocopying the placemats for the Spaghetti supper and I guess we didn’t give the secretary enough time to finish the worship folders.

#1:        You have got to be kidding me!

#2:        Let’s go. We passed another church on our way here. Maybe they’re actually worshipping right now.

#1:        Sounds good to me. Let’s go. (they exit)

Pastor:   Hey, where are you going? Church is just starting… See you at the Spaghetti supper on Saturday!

The End